Whether CBC radio host Jian Gomeshi assaulted his dates as alleged or not, we know that there are people who do. A positive that has arisen from Jian’s fall is the ensuing discourse on and off-line about the dark side of human nature. Unquestionably, some of the best journalistic reflections on violence against women have […]
Thank you to those who made comments about my previous blog. Your remarks have given rise to some points of clarification and further exploration. I am not suggesting that differences and conflict are the same thing. Rather, conflict seems to depend upon how we respond to difference; whether we find our perception of a difference
#24 Differences And Creativity Keep Reading »
Mediators such as myself sometimes speak to their clients about the creative opportunity that conflict may present. Really, how deep and foundational is this notion of a link between conflict and creative opportunity? Deep I think. Whether speaking of creativity in such a manner is an effective way to engage a mediation participant is another
#23 The Origins of Conflict and Creativity Keep Reading »
High performance teams where the group achieves surprising levels of productivity are rare. The consultant Patrick Lencioni writes about five important team capacities: trust, conflict engagement, commitment, accountability, and results focus. When referring to trust, which he places at the foundation of a well-functioning team, Lencioni stresses the vulnerability face of trust. Vulnerability means
#22 Vulnerability on Teams Keep Reading »
In this blog, I further explore last week’s topic of moral reasoning in conflict. When people are in conflict they justify retaliatory behaviour as appropriate. As each party reactively retaliates they engage in behaviour they would otherwise consider inappropriate. This response pattern seems to be prevalent and almost automatic in many cultures including the
#15 Moral Reasoning and Conflict Keep Reading »
Gail and I were recently at a dinner table with a couple that live in rural California. The male half of this couple, who I will call Paul, told a story that I found quite revealing about how we humans may rationalize hurting others. Apparently Paul and his wife live in a free shooting
#14 Distortion of Moral Reasoning in Conflict Keep Reading »
In my previous blog I provided some questions that will help you prepare for any negotiation. The questions below are supplemental. They are additional preparatory questions to help you orient yourself and ground yourself when there are conflict dynamics in a negotiating relationship. These questions also deepen your preparation work. The questions below also function to
#13 Preparing for Negotiation When There is Conflict Keep Reading »
I am using the term ‘negotiation’ broadly, applying it to a wide variety of situations where groups or individuals are seeking an agreement. Central elements of a negotiation are similar whether it is a personal relationship, a business arrangement, or a diplomatic issue between nations. In all of these situations the parties have different
#12 Increase Your Power at Negotiation Keep Reading »
When people are in conflict they see things differently. They each have their own truth, but the two truths differ. Although this is a central feature of conflict, the mediation field has not addressed it very well. Some general approaches that are used in mediation include: Assisting parties to treat the situation as
#11 Negotiating the Truth Keep Reading »
