#15 Moral Reasoning and Conflict

  In this blog, I further explore last week’s topic of moral reasoning in conflict. When people are in conflict they justify retaliatory behaviour as appropriate. As each party reactively retaliates they engage in behaviour they would otherwise consider inappropriate. This response pattern seems to be prevalent and almost automatic … Continue reading

#14 Distortion of Moral Reasoning in Conflict

  Gail and I were recently at a dinner table with a couple that live in rural California. The male half of this couple, who I will call Paul, told a story that I found quite revealing about how we humans may rationalize hurting others. Apparently Paul and his wife … Continue reading

#13 Preparing for Negotiation When There is Conflict

  In my previous blog I provided some questions that will help you prepare for any negotiation. The questions below are supplemental. They are additional preparatory questions to help you orient yourself and ground yourself when there are conflict dynamics in a negotiating relationship. These questions also deepen your preparation work. The … Continue reading

#12 Increase Your Power at Negotiation

  I am using the term ‘negotiation’ broadly, applying it to a wide variety of situations where groups or individuals are seeking an agreement. Central elements of a negotiation are similar whether it is a personal relationship, a business arrangement, or a diplomatic issue between nations. In all of these … Continue reading

#11 Negotiating the Truth

  When people are in conflict they see things differently. They each have their own truth, but the two truths differ. Although this is a central feature of conflict, the mediation field has not addressed it very well. Some general approaches that are used in mediation include:   Assisting parties … Continue reading

#10 Why Victims are Attracted to Offenders

  You leave work and approach your car. Someone has tried to break in. You look around, but see no one. You feel angry and frustrated by the damage and inconvenience this will cause. You feel violated. Who was the person who did this? Why did he or she do … Continue reading

#9 Five Questions that Test Your Ability to Be Collaborative

  Collaboration can be described as a style of conflict engagement that seeks cooperation with the other party and strives to generate outcomes that benefit both parties in a maximum and balanced manner.   Here is one of the frequent challenges presented by a conflict. How much do you compete … Continue reading

#8 Are Conflict and Spirituality Connected?

  Cinnie Noble recently raised the topic of conflict and spirituality in her LinkedIn group, the Conflict Coaching Guild. This is a topic close to my heart and one I will likely return to in future posts. Through the lively discussion Cinnie started, I discerned a division in approaches to … Continue reading

#7 Empower the Effectiveness of Your Team with Process

  Tasks are what a team does to accomplish its objectives. Process is how the team goes about those tasks. Being an effective team depends as much on team processes as the capabilities of its membership. Process is particularly relevant in team meetings. Shifting to process requires two steps. We … Continue reading

#6 The Task and Process Approach to Team Communication

  One of the most important skills of conflict competence is understanding and making use of the difference between task and process.   We will continue to make use of the team meeting in an imaginary organization first introduced two weeks ago. Stephanie had begun to comment on a product … Continue reading